brecken's birthday

we had a great time celebrating miss b's first birthday. we kept it simple...i basically just made treats that i was in the mood for. cake balls, and chocolate covered strawberries :) and then since we kind of did it in the early morning/afternoon i threw in some donuts. so, i went "all out" for grants birthday last year. did a whole big cars themed birthday party and it was a LOT of work... never. never will i do that again. haha. they enjoy it just as much when you keep it simple. especially when they are young. so i didn't stress too much about b's first birthday. just wanted to invite family over, have some treats, and celebrate our little girl. and it was perfect.

she got some fun presents from family and she loved the frosting on her cake. she was pretty dainty while eating it though!!! i thought she would really get in there and be messy because she's obsessed with food, but she didn't... as we let her sit there she progressively got messier, but she still didn't really "go to town" on it. haha. she was very cute and loved everyone singing to her and grant helped her blow her candle out, which he loved. i will say, he had a hard time not being the center of attention (eye roll emoji)... good thing his birthday's coming up here in a WEEK and we can dote on him a little (not like he doesn't get doted on all the time by errrrrrbody....).

anyway... HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY my sweet girl. 

brecken rose: 12 months

my little girl turned one on february 25th! it was so fun to celebrate her last saturday and i have pictures from our low-key little party that i'll post later.

but first...the last of the monthly update!

we went to the doctor the week after her birthday and have her stats...

weight:17.8 lbs                 percentile: 19%

height: 26 1/4 inches           percentile: 4.5%

she's so little! i didn't think she was so little, but her percentages say otherwise. her weight dropped in percentile by kind of a lot and it made me a little worried but they said it was pretty normal, especially as she has gotten more mobile!

so let's get to it...

eating: i will just say that i HATE feeding one year olds..... hate hate hate it. they only have front teeth, can't chew anything, but are supposed to be eating table food now. so if any of you mom's have good ideas on what you fed your babies when they were this age...hit me up. she seems eats a lot of baby food still and i have only come across one that she won't eat, the brown rice and black bean one.... so we crossed that off our list. everything else she will eat just fine. she will eat anything i'm eating of course. and then she is still nursing in the morning, at night, and about once in the day. she doesn't seem to want to quit nursing any time soon. i have tried to get rid of the daytime feeding and she's not having it yet.... she will want up, then bang her head against my chest and just start rolling around on my crying until i nurse her.... it's quite funny actually. so....we will attempt to wean her soon, but, just now quite yet i guess!

she started taking cow's milk and is on and off about it. sometimes she will drink a ton, other times she doesn't want anything to do with it. so once i get her drinking that more i can wean her a little better i think.

sleeping: nothing to report here. she has done a bit better and doesn't wake up as often as she used to. usually just once and it's usually early in the morning like around 5 or so... then will go back to sleep. she still takes 2 naps/day and i'm hanging on to those for as long as possible. 

milestones: after reading last months milestones i feel like miss b has made some headway this last month! she is now officially "walking"...and i use quotations because she will only take about 5 or 6 steps at a time but she is slowly starting to get more brave. just today i have noticed that if she falls down, instead of just crawling to where she wants to go, she will stand back up and try to walk again. so that's exciting! i won't lie, i love it when my kids finally start walking. she also is starting to get more chatty! she tries to mimic a lot of words now. she can officially say "mama", "dada", "uh-oh", "boo", "owe", and she attempts to say "peek-a-boo" but it comes out more like "ek-a-boo"..it's still very cute. and she tries to say "piggy wiggy's" but just does funny stuff with her mouth. it's cute to watch her try and learn to form new words. she can sign the words please, more, and all done (or finished). 

things i want to remember: 

brecken is so silly. i want to always remember that. she loves to copy sounds and laughs at everything. she thinks grant is hilarious still and he loves to make her laugh. she does this funny thing where she fake cries or whines now and i find it very cute and humorous. she also is so easy to egg on.... (is that the right use of "egg???" or is it just "eg" ? haha) if she is upset about something and you make a sad face at her and start saying things like "oh, no...brecken??? what happened???? oh no!!!" she will get more and more upset.... it's so funny. for example...i took her binki away the other morning cause she only gets it when she sleeps now and she kind of whined about it and norman started doing what i described above and got her to the point where she was crying and looking at me like i was the worst person in the world. hahaha. it actually made me laugh pretty hard. 

she really does have the best personality. and i love her crazy hair. that girl has the worst bed head and i love it every morning. she shows a lot of expression through her eyes and i think they are beautiful because of that. 

she is simply the best and we were so happy to have a reason to celebrate her!

happy one year miss b! looking forward to spending many more birthdays with you!!

my girl....

a year ago in about 2 hours from now my water broke.... and this amazing little girl entered our lives. i love this picture because it's when we first met...even though she had been occupying a good chunk of space in my body for the previous 9 months...this was the first time we laid eyes on each other. and i still remember our instant connection. 

for me... after i had grant i was more anxious about trying to figure out how to be a mom that i feel like it took me a little longer to really feel that bond with him.

but brecken...hers was instantaneous. i felt something from her that touched my soul. i know that sounds cheesy... but it's true. and i felt that bond instantly... and if i'm being honest... i still feel that with her. i don't know how to describe it, and i keep writing sentences and erasing them because i don't know how to say it. but she is a special girl. she has lit up all of our lives. often times norman and i will be talking about her or playing with her and one of us will just say... gosh...i just love her so much!!!! 

there is just something about her little personality and her interactions with me and others that makes something in my soul so happy. anyway..... i can't describe it so i'll stop trying to. hah...i'm just feeling all nostalgic tonight because i'm just thinking about how almost a year ago exactly she changed our lives for the better and i am so glad my heavenly father trusted us with such a beautiful soul. 

.................................

below are pictures that i found that i never posted of the first bath i gave her...with grant helping. :) i think even grant feels what we feel about brecken. he loves his sister and it's so fun to see them together. having kids really is the best...ever. let's have some more, norm..k???? k... 

(by the way...don't want this post to sound like i love grant any less than i love brecken hahah... i'm just expressing how precious my little girl is to us, too).  :)

be happy today

 so....everyone (besides brecken probably...) was sooooo grumpy during family pictures this year. it was freeeeezing cold, norman and i had argued about something right before (in true picture taking day fashion), grant literally cried in every picture.... you know...just normal things for family picture day... haha. but i wanted to share the rest of our pictures because at least brecken was cute!

but also i've been thinking.... gaining some perspective.... and wanted to write it down to remind myself of the important things in life. and i feel like i've talked about this before but i need the reminder time to time. so like i have mentioned before, we bought a house! and when you buy a house what do you want to do????? buy eeeeeeeeverything. i want to change this, and paint that, and get new couches here and new beds there and a dresser and a dining table, oh and since we have hardwood floors...gotta get some rugs, etc etc...the list LITERALLY never ends. so you go online to get inspiration for this new house and you see all these beautifully perfect homes. and you feel a little lame.... or start wishing you had something different... or more money to do what you wanted... or the creativity to make your home look "pinterest worthy" or "instagram worthy"... and sometimes i look at homes and the negative spiral starts.... and i'm like .. where is the reality here??? where is your garbage cans? and laundry baskets? or even stuff that your husband has and likes but is maybe not your taste and you can't get rid of it?? where is all that stuff? where is your mail? (is that just me that leaves mail laying around everywhere???) anyway... i just feel like it's not realistic!! and it angers me! and you know what?? it shouldn't. and that's what i have to remind myself. 

because you know what i have come to realize? i get just as clean in my older, not so modern shower as someone who does in a beautiful white subway tiled shower. and my food tastes just as good in my small little kitchen as it would in a big kitchen with a beautiful island. and i sleep just as good with my DIY wood headboard as i would with an expensive bedroom set. i have just as meaningful, inspiring, and memorable conversations on my old couches as i would on brand new west elm couches. my kids have just as much fun in their not perfectly put together toy room as they would in one that was. 

you get my point.

it's the experiences, the people, and the love in our homes that matter. and yes, i still want to make my home feel the way i want it to feel by decorating it the way i want to decorate... but it doesn't need to consume me or make me feel like a loser if i don't have everything i want all at once. and i'm cool with my house looking halfway put together until we can start getting those things i would like to have. but they aren't necessary to my happiness. my family is necessary to my happiness. dancing with grant to moana while brecken laughs at us in our living room with 4 different styles of furniture is what makes me happy, giving brecken and grant a bath and watching them splash and laugh and then drying them off with old bleach stained towels makes me happy, eating dinner at our TINY table on folding chairs with my family and listening to grant ask us funny questions and make funny faces while brecken literally eats his crumbs off the floor makes me happy, staying up late with my husband laughing at our favorite shows in our bedroom with clothes EVERYWHERE cause we don't yet have a dresser even makes me happy. 

those are what i need to hold onto when i feel that negative spiral start..... the envy.... the pride looking up..... i want those moments to be fewer between the good moments where i appreciate the truly great people i have in my life and our experiences together, until eventually, that envy and pride is gone and i am just truly happy with what i have and where i'm at. so here's to feeling happy today! and feeling grateful for what i DO have instead of coveting what i don't.